Police Jokes, Humor and Satire
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      • Old Prisoner
        01/29/08
        A new man is brought into his Prison Cell.

        Already there is a long-time resident who looks at least 100 years old.

        The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly.

        The old-timer says, "Look at me. I'm old and worn out.

        You'd never believe

      • Circle Flies
        01/29/08
        An old farmer was hauling a load of manure when he was stopped by a state trooper. "You were speeding," the cop said. "I'm going to have to give you a ticket."

        "Yep," the farmer said as he watched the trooper shoo away several flies.

        "The

      • I Can Explain
        01/28/08
        A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain."

        "Quiet!" snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back."

      • Drinking And Driving
        01/28/08
        Three guys were driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over.
        The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We're in trouble!"

        &

      • A Police Officer Needs A Vacation If
        01/26/08
        9. Every Tuesday he insists it's his turn to be the siren.

        8. He wants to transfer to a K-9 unit because he thinks he'd look good in a collar.

        7. He wants to be called "Judge Dredd", and he insists that all suspects should be executed right there on the spot

      • Eyes Show It
        01/26/08
        A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over he says, "Sir, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?"

        The man gets really indignant and says, "Officer, I couldn't help

      • Escaped Convict
        01/26/08
        An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom.

        As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous young wife, bound up on the bed in a skimpy nightgown, and whispered, "Honey, this guy hasn't seen a woman in

      • Disorderly conduct
        01/26/08
        Three men stood before a judge on a charge of drunk and disorderly conduct in a public park.

        Judge: What were you doing?

        1st man: Oh, just throwing peanuts in the pond.

        Judge: And what were you doing?

        2nd man: I was throwing peanuts in the pond, too."

      • Tacks
        01/26/08
        Driving to work, a gentlman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the carton in the road. The policmen stopped traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contai